Ever feel like your dice have a personal vendetta against your character? Like your trusty D20 waits for the worst possible moment to roll a 1? Before you rage-quit your campaign or accuse the dice gods of cruelty, there’s a fun, nerd-approved method to investigate: the Saltwater Float Test — a low-tech way to uncover high-stakes imbalances.
🧪 The Science Behind It
Most RPG dice are made of plastic, which is denser than water and sinks. But if you add enough salt, you can change the water’s density until the die just barely floats. In this delicate equilibrium, gravity reveals its secrets: any internal weight bias will influence how the die orients itself.
🧂 How to Conduct This Arcane Ritual
-
Prepare the Elixir: Fill a clear glass with warm water. Add table salt until your dice float—this might take quite a bit, so be patient and stir often.
-
Introduce the Suspect: Gently drop in your die and let it come to rest.
-
Interrogate It: Spin the die lightly and let it settle multiple times. Keep track of what number faces up each time.
-
Analyze the Pattern: If one face rises suspiciously often, your die may be biased. Perhaps that streak of critical fails wasn’t just bad luck...
🔍 What It Tells You
-
Balanced Dice: Will rest on random faces when floated and spun multiple times.
-
Cursed Dice: Will favor a particular face—hinting at uneven weight distribution or manufacturing flaws.
🧙 Why It Matters
In casual games, a slightly off-balance die might just be flavor. But if you're in a tight campaign, rolling for loot, life, or the fate of the multiverse, you deserve a fair shot. Consider this your DIY alignment check—for your dice.
So next time your rogue fails another stealth check, don’t curse your DM—run the saltwater test. Because in the battle between chaos and order, even a die needs to play fair.